The Kids from the Islands
Kids from the islands always live on the islands for there is no other way or place for them to live. When they move, when they leave their homes, they very often go from one island to the next. Their friends and families live on these islands also. Those who did not grow up on the islands never feel comfortable on their rare visits. These islands exist in every state, every county and every city in our country.
These kids from the islands that I speak of live in a world that doesn’t include them or make sense to them but also a world where their strengths are not in line with the strengths they will need to be successful according to the current culture of our communities. Kids from the islands at much greater rates do not finish schooling thru high school, have criminal records at age 18 and face a lifelong string of decisions that will be misunderstood. They learn as all of us learn but what they are at a basic level is slightly different then any of the kids not from the islands which includes the other kids and the other kids friends and family.
The kids from the islands are only different due to the things learned when they had no choice in the matter due to the relationship with who was teaching these things to them. Their very own family in many cases, their mothers, fathers, sisters and brothers. There are some people who are very capable in most ways and can successfully navigate parenting the first time, with others sometimes it’s the fifth child when they get it right.
we can only know what we have been taught
we can only teach what we know
what we know longest we know best
And we have no choice but to teach the things we have learned in our own way
Makes a person think about where and by whom they were taught things that they enjoy and or do not enjoy.
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The kids from the islands have a much greater chance of learning things that are not beneficial but have a toughness in them that transcends physical ability due to the mental aspects of growing up in abusive environments. Kids from the islands live in antisocial environments usually all their lives and when they leave those islands much can go wrong. Often times the things that went unnoticed that they saw their parent(s) doing all the time will land a person in prison for years when done outside of the home or the islands.
An example: A fist fight over a girl between school aged friends gets handled differently depending what side of the tracks you’re on. On the right side of the tracks a person may be committing felony level offenses but on the wrong side of the tracks you give the kids some frozen peas for their injuries and a pat on the back if they showed heart. Fast forward those kids to 25 years old while they’re facing some adversity and guess who is likely to over react and also pick up criminal charges for the incident? The party that has been exposed to the most aggression up to that point in their lives will likely come to the ‘better defend myself’ conclusion first and thus it appears as if they are the aggressor and couple that with a prior criminal record and if anyone is going to face discipline for that event the aggressor will.
These kids from the islands I refer to if they survive the period of time of their abuse are survivors of childhood abuse. Adult survivors of early childhood abuse will need access to support at different times of their lives and for different reasons and if the help is there it reduces the probability of antisocial behaviors to meet the same goal. To create opportunities for adult survivors of early childhood abuse to gain the things that they believe they need in ways that are socially acceptable would be a positive and morally sound decision that would help a fairly large group of people and would pay dividends GraceUSA believes by reducing the costs of the criminal justice system, reduce recidivism rates of offenders, reduce the associated insurance costs, allow greater numbers of Americans to thrive, validate the harm that occurred to those harmed and others and in general and send good ripples into the world.
What is a person who is being effected negatively by something who has no choice but to suffer with the thing besides a victim.
GraceUSA is dedicated to help end this cycle of abuse. The families that live on these islands pass abuse of their own kind to those that witness those abuses. Most often their own children are who witness their particular forms of abuse over and over and others that spend time around them as well. These are unnecessary harms that are hidden behind the thousand and one small decisions that created harm without fully realizing where all those little baby steps in the wrong direction we’re getting them.
All forms of abuse are learned traits that often will only make sense when repeated over and over when a person is developing. To those not exposed to the same traits, they would seem incorrect or wrong immediately. How many men grow up, watching their father or mother physically abuse their partner for all sorts of reasons only to have the son or daughter grow up and see the same reasons to do the same things to their own children similarly?
This is how both good character traits and not good character traits are spread over time.
The responsibility of the care taker is understated as of yet is our belief.
GraceUSA’s first mission is to protect children and assist adult survivors and to educate and spread awareness of this never ending, always increasing percentage of abusive homes in our country. We will work towards further weaponizing our K-3rd grade teachers and administrators who have a unique advantage and opportunity to protect and offer help to these kids that absolutely need the help during that critical time period. They know what kids are unable to sit still, follow directions, follow rules and also who keeps up on homework and assignments. At that age it’s still late for intervention to be entirely successful but if abuse is occurring we have to start catching it and helping these kids with a whatever it takes attitude or the child will grow up and have antisocial behaviors and beliefs that will not be easy to deal with, curb or discipline out of them. It is no surprise or mistake that our most successful citizens are often raised by successful people and successful people are not normally abusive or antisocial in nature.
In order to truly meet this goal GraceUSA will advocate for criminal justice and social reform as well as increasing both the number of mandatory reporters in the world of children and also the consequences for those reporters who fail to act when they could have so there can be little doubt in any individuals mind about if they should file a report to help the child.
Each year there are more and more children born into antisocial environments who will likely grow to adults and teach their children and possibly someone else’s the same antisocial behaviors and abuses and that is how the numbers are growing as they are which we believe should be considered rapidly growing.
As in so many issues a little more love and understanding is needed in these matters and also many specialized highly trained medical staff paired with specialized highly trained law enforcement agents with large enough budgets to recruit our best and brightest to this cause for no sustainable improvements in any area of our culture can happen while this problem which effects every single person in the United States remains.